Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Curve Ball, Part 2

To catch up read this.

Needless to say, I've been extremely tired from stress (learning as I go, a completely new job that I was trained on superfast, and doing my old one).

To Be Continued...

The Friday of my co-workers last day, we shut the office down early and went out for drinks. I couldn't go all out because I was driving 3.5 hours to go see S.

Prior to even finding out about the job, S and I had a fight. Essentially he was stressed out over money and job stuff, but I had to punch him in the throat had to ask him for a week what was wrong. I could tell he was acting different and I didn't know what to do because I didn't know what the problem was. I thought maybe it was me. Did he not like me anymore? Did he find someone else he liked better? All kinds of questions ran through my head, making me doubt our relationship. When he finally decided to tell me what was bothering him, I ended up getting pissed.

Communication is huge in a relationship. As far as I'm concerned, if you don't have communication, trust and love, you have nothing. I've been in two very long relationships where there was poor communication and I absolutely refuse to do that again. I summed it up for S and told him that if he couldn't communicate with me, we didn't need to be together.

Since that fight, I felt like things hadn't really been the same between us. I had actually told him that I didn't want to come up (the weekend of my co-worker's last day) because he was supposed to have friends in town and I thought he and I needed one-on-one time. I suggested going up the weekend before his friends would be there. We talked and he wanted me to still come that weekend. So after the going away drinks, I went to see him. I was absolutely exhausted when I got there. We had a nice weekend, but I would have honestly much rather been at home relaxing because I was working to the max all that week trying to train. I don't let a lot of things interfere with my sleep, and I hadn't gotten much of it because I knew I had to get what I was going to be doing.

We have definitely been fighting more. Distance is hard. Added stress of a job, and an hour time difference does not help any. Plus if you factor in I've been exhausted and wanted to do nothing but sleep..well that leaves little time for him.

I'm not sure where exactly this puts us in our relationship. Every thing happens for a reason and I truly believe that. Even if you don't know that reason at the time. All I know to do is to pray about everything and know that in time, the Plan will be revealed...


  1. It sounds like you are having a rough time girl! I haven't been in a long distance relationship, and I feel for you, because I don't even want to imagine it. I hope things work out for the best! I'll be thinking about you!

  2. Oh sweet girl! Take a deeeeeppppp breath! Exhale! do it 10 more times! There, feel a teeny bit better?!?! HOpefully you do!

    I agree with you 100% on communication. I've been with my man for 1.7 years and we have def had ups and downs with communication. I have been in past relationships where communication is bad and told myself like you, never again. It's taken some long and hard talks with my current bf, but he gets it now. JUST tell me you are upset, and that you need time and I'll leave you alone.

    I don't know S and your relationship, but just continue to pray and follow your heart. DON'T Compromise and if he isn't the right one, there is someone out there.

    WOW, this is so long....oooppppsss! Okay, chin up! THinking of you!


  3. saw your facbook.... like you said, it all will work out the way its supposed to. hang in there


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